Random (yet atrocious) songs I (dis)like...

Since people have apparently been a bit bored of the onslaught of mediocre yet entertaining movies, thought that I should probably look at a wee bit something else. Songs perhaps...so voila el habibi people! (Whatever that meant...). Presenting you with an intriguing list of the top 5 most mmmmmm (thinking what to appropriately write)....err whatever..... SONGS!

 5. Sarkai Leyo Khatia Jaada Lage: This one refers to the most talked about jodi in the mid 90's era. No certainly not Govinda and Karishma Kapoor...Govinda and David Dhawan. Only such a jodi could come up with such a boisterous and self embracing song. I mean literally self embracing since the song actually talks about moving the bed since its apparently cold outside.


Food for thought: This exemplifies the perfect excuse to snuggle up to your better half (Don’t even think of Karishma please...let her shave her eyebrows and return). Most importantly, Jaada here refers to cold or winter, with not even the remotest connection to tissue fat. Wait wasn't Govinda featured in the song. Maybe it was a different meaning. Perhaps we would never know. One of the most unwanted (gupt) mysteries of all time will remain a mystery. Till then, sarkai leyoo…


4. Yaar Bina Chain Kahaan re: At number 4, we have the infamous and evergreen Anil Kapoor, (with his equally evergreen hairy chest) swooning to the actress, who I for some reason always considered as a vamp. The song is from a movie ‘Saahib’ (who the hell names their kids like that!) focused on the beautiful game of football, and our evergreen man (with his evergreen chest hair) is the Goalkeeper, albeit the least focused player in the team. The movie is an ode to the fact that the least focused player can sometimes be the hero or the main focus of the movie. I’m sure you who are reading this have lost focus on what I am referring to.

Food for thought: The song has absolutely nothing to do with Chains, or ornaments for that matter. Perhaps since the actor was a Goalkeeper and earned a paltry salary for his service of being a Goalkeeper (and showing off his evergreen chest hair), he really didn’t have much to spend on his amore and whatever little he did his amore coaxed him to buy a chain for her. Always! So, in essence if there is no amore, you can seek the chain for yourself and keep it...


3. Made in India: The equally evergreen Alisha Chinai (absolutely no references to chest hair) crooned this song (most importantly) in India, ensuring that in spite of the nation opening up the economy to foreign investment in the 90’s, swadeshi will always remain a cool thing to wear. (Yo dude, take out my khadi kurta Man!) One finds a half nude Milind Soman attracting a not-so-nude Alisha Chinai. Any guesses why? Simple, because he is “Made in India”. Duh! Everybody knows that! Why Milind Soman is packed in a box is another unanswered mystery though.


Food for thought: One should always buy stuff that is “Made in India”. Because ‘Dil jiska Hindustani, nahin koi Inglistani (Point to ponder: the British ruled India before independence) raat aur din mujhe pyaar koi karnewala’. Get it? No? Indian males apparently have higher sexual promiscuity. But my point is: Why does he lift Alisha Chinai at the end? Higher sexual promiscuity or probably he wanted to dump her in the box and free himself. (This is getting more and more murkier by the minute).

 2. Gutur Gutur: At no.2, we have the ayeee! Mithun Chakraborty talking elaborately to (ahem ahem) cutely sweet or sweetly cute Ayesha Jhulka about how a pigeon has climbed up and is the object of envy. While this song probably parallels the feeling that Mithin has for his beau, the use of equally elaborate bird sounds in the title is baffling to say the least. Perhaps it’s just another figure of speech – “Onomatopoeia” to be precise.

Food for thought: The pigeons are just another medium hereto describe the heroine and her movements. But the sounds continue to baffle…Onomatopoeia aside, yet there is deliberate moaning and crooning in the song that entitles it to the rightful place of number 2 in this list.


1. Hai Huku Hai Huku Hai Hai: Sunil Shetty epitomized the inanity and the ambiguity of the meaning of the songs of the 90’s. Note: I have eliminated certain interesting candidates for the Numero Uno positions, primarily songs like – Ladki Sheher ki Ladki (too sexist in nature), Meri Marzee (owing to patriotism towards the end of the song) and Cholee ke peeche (too wild for the imagination). Again with extensive use of onomatopoeia, perhaps not actually….since no known species till date uses ‘hai huku hai’ as an identifiable sound. The song essentially talks about the fact that the guy/girl standing in front of the character takes the heart away. That’s it! That’s all the logic that there is to this song. Nothing too much, nothing too less….just the right balance. Hence, it has its rightful place at the numero uno position.


Food for thought: One ought to count the number of hai’s and the huku’s in the song as a cure for amnesia. Although not yet tested on animals the song is said to be a potent cure to the problem of amnesia. That you may contract migraine as a substitute, after listening to the song repeatedly however is yet to be mentioned explicitly in the disclaimer. One can nevertheless stare at Sunil Shetty’s inner vest for divine inspiration.






{Brickbats are welcome after this post! Thou shall also not share any links to this post on Facebook!}. [Photo courtesy: subwaysurfer blogspot]